Hiding in Plain Sight

I put my phone on do not disturb to shut out the world. I say I need time away from social media and it’s better for my health. The truth is, with my phone off, I can hide without having to put up a false front.

Even though I am much better alone now, than the toxic relationship I spent years in, it still pains me to navigate parenthood alone. I play the role of the mother and father and I don’t think I am winning. I don’t have anyone to talk to at the end of the night to tell me we can figure this out. I am struggling through this battle to help a kid when I myself don’t have the answers. In my own passive aggressive way I try to reach out and but find myself alone to overcome these obstacles.

Being alone—I’ve learned to live with that. But being alone while trying to save my son? That’s a kind of weight I’m not sure I can bear.